Carrying the blue scarf into Dublin
Monday night was the first time I followed Linfield outside of the north and I must say I was a little apprehensive! Last season Linfield played Derry and on their way out of the maiden city six buses of blue men were bricked. It was a miracle no-one was hurt!! A friend of mine who was on one of the buses said that it was the most scared he’d ever been as he boarded the bus and looked up the road to notice sizable crowds on either side of the pavement. He was filled with dread as he realised that there was not a peeler in sight.

As I pondered over buying a ticket for Monday night’s match, scenes of the recent “Love Ulster” rally that escalated into riots in Dublin were fresh in my memory. As I assessed the pros and cons of the situation I felt an opposition well up from within me. Why should I let thugs get in the way of my attendance, and if everyone allowed the fear of what might happen to prevent them from attending, were would it eventually take us. So in a moment of passion and opposition I slapped my money on the counter and bought my ticket.

As we travelled down the craic was mighty but be in no doubt, there was a certain tension having my Linfield scarf with me as we travelled into the south. Being male is sometimes a strange thing and some of the emotions it brings with it are often bizarre. I remember feeling that somehow it was important for me to feel free to express my identity without fear of intimidation in the South and yet this was only really about football. Or was it? If Ireland is to be free for all and the North and South are to get on and even unite then it’s surely time for people across the island to accept and even embrace difference.

As I say emotions are often bizarre, and I was intrigued by my sense of immense pride and belonging as I walked into a hotel lounge to join 150 other blue men kitted out in scarves, replica tops and flags. Yet no more than an hour later I felt intense shame and embarrassment as I witnessed one drunken blue man sing “I hate fenians, you are fenians” and pointing at a group of passers by. Linfield at a Club level has gone to some considerable lengths (Click on link for recent statement) to remove bigotry from its ranks yet you get the feeling that it’s an impossible task.



Does that then taint me, guilty by association? Does it compromise my witness? Is it the kind of thing I should be involved in as a Christian? As these questions nudge and prod me (pardon the pun) I get that sense of opposition well up within me. Surely Christ led by example and mingled with some very unsavoury sorts. Should I deny an allegiance and passion within me which has been handed down for generations because others within it are found wanting? If that’s the case what am I doing believing in and attending Church? Surely the parts of it that are rotten and fairly obviously rotten should deny my participation in it if that’s the case.

I’ll leave it there as most of these thoughts are taking me consciously into virgin territory of the mind, unprocessed and unfiltered. But in conclusion I realise that I’ve hit vibrant waters within me that run deep and it’s important for me to see it through. (Further thoughts and reflections may come shortly)